Interrupting normal service

To bring you some news from the étrange life of Grier - a slight explanation of the reduced frequency of blog posts of late. Delighted to announce that I'm engaged to be married to Chris Statter. Chris works for Birmingham City Mission and comes from Manchester (via Oxford). 

Chris dropped to his knees and proposed during a game of Poohsticks in Belvoir forest park in Belfast! We're thankful to our Father in heaven and pray he'd fill us with his Spirit to show the glories of his grace to us in Christ Jesus, in and through our engagement and future marriage.

Whole of life as... premarital counselling

There's a strange phenomenon around: people being engaged for ... 5, 10+ years. No wedding in sight, apparently. Now, whatever the sociological reasons for that, it's not unlike a lot of us Christians live. We're engaged, but sort of forgetful that we've a wedding ahead - we live as if we're not planning or looking forward to anything.

In these very helpful paragraphs, from 'Instruments in the Redeemer's Hands', Paul Tripp explains that the only way to go through life properly is to understand we are engaged:

Keeping the final destination in view is the only way to solve the problems of today. ... Paul captures this principle of 'long view living' in 2 Corinthians 11:1-3.

I hope you will put up with a little of my foolishness; but you are already doing that. I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him. But I am afraid that just as Eve was deceived by the serpent's cunning, your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ.

Paul understands the Christian life eschatologically. This means that today is preparation for tomorrow, and tomorrow is preparation for something else to come. Paul is saying, 'I know I have hovered over you, but you need to understand why. I am afraid that you will forget who you are and to whom you have been promised.' To Paul, the only way to go through life properly is to understand that we are engaged. We have been betrothed to Christ, and our life now is preparation for the great wedding to come.

The difficulties now, the suffering now, the disappointments now, and hte blessings now are all preparation fo the wedding then. Our experiences today do not reflect God's inattention or unfaithfulness, but his jealous love. He is exposing our wandering hearts and foolish minds and the ways we trust our passions more than the principles of his Word. He is calling us to forsake our own glory for his, and teaching us that the idols we pursue will never satisfy us. He is making us wise to temptation and aware of a lurking enemy. He is teaching us to live for treasures that moth and rust can't destroy and that thieves can't steal. He is teaching us what it means to live in a way that recognises our identity as his children. He is teaching us to live open, approachable, and humble lives.

In other words, your whole life is premarital counselling! You belong to a groom whose name is Immanuel, and God is preparing you for the wedding for which you were created and redeemed. Everything you face today is premarital preparation - living now with then in view.

In contrast, sin produces in all of us a tendency toward 'now-ism,' which means we forget three things: who we are (betrothed to Christ); what he is doing now (preparing us for the final wedding); and what we are supposed to be doing (remaining faithful to him). When we focus only on what we want now, we fail to solve our problems and we also cause more difficulties. A common factor in depression is self-absorbed now-ism. Anger is often fuelled by a self-righteous now-ism. Fear and anxiety are strengthened by an obsession with the here and now. Maturity and perseverance are weakened by a 'now' mentality.

Teaching others how to solve now problems with then in view is one of the most important things we can do, because it is not something we sinners do well on our own. We tend to be short-sighted and self-absorbed. We forget that God's primary goal is not changing our situations and relationships so that we can be happy, but changing us through our situations and relationships so that we will be holy. We need people who love God and us enough to come alongside and help us deal with our spiritual myopia.

Wedding prep

The royal wedding was beautiful. It brought an unexpected tear to my eye as I was reminded of the greater future wedding of the once and future King, when every eye will see him. (Broadcast entirely funded by the Father, freeview.) 

The guest list is set, though we're still waiting for everyone to arrive - coming from far more countries than the Commonwealth. It's all been catered for. The choir's booked, the anthem written, and the processional fanfare has some marvellous words. People have been lining the streets waiting for a long time. It's no secret what we'll be wearing - it's been provided by the Father of the groom!

I was so disappointed that the sermon at William and Catherine's wedding contained so much truth, but didn't point to Christ. It began well: 'You have chosen to be married in the sight of a generous God, who so loved the world, that he gave himself to us in his Son.' But the general sentiment of the address seemed to be that with God's help we all evolve spiritually into the creation of the better world to which we look forward. The speaker missed why we need a self-giving God - not just as an example for marriage, but that we can't bring about a better world with just a bit of divine help. That's why Jesus died, rose and is coming again.

Hint: you know there's something skewed about a wedding address if Jesus' redemption of his bride, 

and return to consummate his new creation, is lacking. (Actually, you know there's a lot wrong with any Christian sermon if Jesus and his finished redeeming work is conspicuously absent.) 

We had the good of marriage upheld, but none of the beauty of Christ, and there's something very wrong about that. 

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendour, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. [Eph.5.25-33]

For the good of the married couple; for the blessing of every one of the x million listeners, viewers and those attending; they should have been told that it's not ultimately about them. 

• That although this day is for celebrating their union, it points to the union of Christ and his bride. 
• That although Prince William is, we trust, a future king, he is eclipsed in every way by the King of kings, Jesus. 
• That while Catherine was beautifully radiant in her dress, the betrothed of Christ is going to be spotless and peerless. 
• They have vowed to be united, 'Until death us do part,' yet there is a greater promise, which defeated death. 
• While they are caught up into each other's presence, the royal family, and the palace, there is a better presence, a greater family, and a palace beyond all imagining. 

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God.  He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain any more, for the former things have passed away.” [Rev.21.1-4]

The crowds lining the roads merely to cheer, indicated how much we want to participate in such a glorious event. Far more can we look forward to participating gloriously in the Wedding of all history. Just make sure you don't ignore, forget or slight the invitation - or think you can get in on your own merits.

With words of Luther: 

Christ, that rich and pious husband, takes as a wife a needy and impious harlot, redeeming her from all her evils and supplying her with all his good things. It is impossible now that her sins should destroy her, since they have been laid upon Christ and swallowed up in him, and since she has in her husband Christ a righteousness which she may claim as her own, and which she can set up with confidence against all her sins, against death and hell, saying, "If I have sinned, my Christ, in whom I believe, has not sinned; all mine is his, and all his is mine," as it is written, "My beloved is mine, and I am his" (Cant. ii. 16).

Wedding season

My housemate's away for one; I'm aware of others having one today, and next weekend I'll enjoy witnessing another. Happily, the younger royals are getting in on the act, too. Yes, it's the season of weddings again - a joy to celebrate with friends. No need to feel left out, though: the best marriage in the universe is on offer to you, the one to which all the others just point. The one which will last beyond the sunset at the end of the film, and indeed, beyond the most lasting of these temporary marriages, because they can only be 'til death part us. For this marriage, the Bridegroom defeated death... so made an eternal promise. 

The engagement ring came with these words: 

And I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and in mercy. I will betroth you to me in faithfulness. And you shall know the Lord.

As the guests gather for weddings now, it's not The Big Day. That's yet to come. [So keep saving for it, so you're ready.] Really, you're seeing a beautiful temporary picture of the Big Day.  

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the Church.

So the wedding ring comes inscribed with the words, 'I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine.' 

Thus that most soppy of theologians, the old German Martin 'married an ex-nun cos she was left over' Luther, wrote: 

The third incomparable grace of faith is this: that it unites the soul to Christ, as the wife to the husband, by which mystery, as the Apostle teaches, Christ and the soul are made one flesh. Now if they are one flesh, and if a true marriage - no, by far the most perfect of all marriages - is accomplished between them (for human marriages are but feeble types of this one great marriage), then it follows that all they have, becomes theirs in common, as well good things as evil things; so that whatsoever Christ possesses, that the believing soul may take to itself and boast of as its own, and whatever belongs to the soul, that Christ claims as His.

If we compare these possessions, we shall see how inestimable is the gain. Christ is full of grace, life, and salvation; the soul is full of sin, death, and condemnation. Let faith step in, and then sin, death, and hell will belong to Christ, and grace, life, and salvation to the soul. For, if he is a husband, he must take to himself that which is his wife's, and at the same time, give to his wife that which is his. For, in giving her his own body and himself, how can he but give her all that is his? And, in taking to himself the body of his wife, how can he but take to himself all that is hers?

In this is displayed the delightful sight, not only of communion, but of a prosperous warfare, of victory, salvation, and redemption. For, Christ is God and man, and is such a person as neither has sinned, nor dies, nor is condemned, indeed, cannot sin, die, or be condemned, and his righteousness, life, and salvation are invincible, eternal, and almighty. So then, when I say, such a person, by the wedding-ring of faith, takes a share in the sins, death, and hell of his wife, nay, makes them his own, and deals with them no differently than as if they were his, and as if he himself had sinned; and when he suffers, dies, and descends to hell, that he may overcome all things, and since sin, death, and hell cannot swallow him up, they must be swallowed up by him in stupendous conflict. For his righteousness rises above the sins of all men; his life is more powerful than all death; his salvation is more unconquerable than all hell.

Thus the believing soul, by the pledge of its faith in Christ, becomes free from all sin, fearless of death, safe from hell, and endowed with the eternal righteousness, life, and salvation of its husband Christ. Thus he presents to himself a glorious bride, without spot or wrinkle, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word; that is, by faith in the word of life, righteousness, and salvation. Thus he betroths her to himself 'in faithfulness, in righteousness, and in judgement, and in loving-kindness, and in mercies' (Hosea ii. 19, 20).

Who then can value highly enough these royal nuptials? Who can comprehend the riches of the glory of this grace? 

Christ, that rich and pious husband, takes as a wife a needy and impious harlot, redeeming her from all her evils and supplying her with all his good things. It is impossible now that her sins should destroy her, since they have been laid upon Christ and swallowed up in him, and since she has in her husband Christ a righteousness which she may claim as her own, and which she can set up with confidence against all her sins, against death and hell, saying, "If I have sinned, my Christ, in whom I believe, has not sinned; all mine is his, and all his is mine," as it is written, "My beloved is mine, and I am his" (Cant. ii. 16). This is what Paul says: "Thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ," victory over sin and death, as he says, "The sting of death is sin, and the strength of sin is the law" (1 Cor. xv. 56, 57).

[From: The Freedom of a Christian]

[Aside: a few friends have posted this beautiful poem by Rael Mason, which captures the secondary place of marriage well, in a love poem, but not as you know it. "You'll never be the centre of my universe."]